haha...funny.....

This few day lots of things happen..... I do not know what to say... the only things is I wanna say... who ever please don't assume anything... or conclude anything... on my status..... who ever.... and for those... who think they really understand me...... you all can just get of my side.... cause non of you will understand me..... thank you.... yes i like to shut up the door so what..... this is me... what can you all do to me.....nothing.... if i think I want to tell... I would just tell...... anyway.... don't ever ever try do anything.... I would not be thankful...... cause I don't need any of yours help... I can settle my own problem........BTW i am human.... I got feeling de..... so I won'd be happy everyday.... sometime... I will feel emo de.....anyway don;t pretend that you understand everything..... 

Anyway...... I have learn a new things.... don';t bother so much.... and don't  care, it will make me feel better.... the most important thing is.... don't be the always.... i don't want to do anything..... cause I am really tired already..... just live everything.... behind...... anyway... there is one thing can't be change... that's all... I can say....anyway...... when the day I say i don't want to be the always.... then I will do as what I say...... 

anyway... this few day.... i have not been stop laughing..... wakaka.... really happy loh....... cause when with this group if friend they really make me feel less stress..... they only make me laugh non stop....wakaka.... happy loh.... nothing to say beside happy......BTW there is one thing I wanna say..... the feeling is totally weird... nothing else just weird.... because I feel the strange..... of all the things...... anyway...... I have do what I want to do...... if don't appreciate it... then everything will have a full stop......

Lots of things in my mind.....

I am wondering.... what am I doing and what I suppose to do actually.... sometimes... I just hope that... I am able to know what is on mind... and what is on heart... haiz again n again....maybe i am just nobody.....cause i am just like the tiny little.....person throughout the million.......thats y my existence is only exist when throughout the million u capture me suddenly....maybe i think to highly of myself......because till now i can never ever.....hv a place that is meant to be just for me......even just a little....


sometime just feel that maybe from the beginning i do not exist....or i shd say i am just nothing.....thats y never ever hv place....in heart or mind.....now  i really do not dare to make any judgement.....or any choice.....because....i really scared....that i would fail....n the most important thing is i scared i might lost it....too.....seriously......i am in a T～junction now....no matter which road i choose i will still be wrong......but the only thing i can say is.....the power was so strong just a word.....or a sentence.....it can make me do anything without having a thought.....maybe you don't remember....but every little....part....it mean to me.... 


 if i have a chance....i hope that i am able to show you one thing.....just one thing.....but i do not hv the courage to do so..... maybe i am the biggest fool in this world....cause i want to ask but i don't even dare to do so.....i only could just.....silently do everything...and try to make everything perfect....try to make happy...and what ever i could do.....just for one purpose....just want you to be happy thats all.....nothing much i ask for....it may sound stupid but i really mean it..... when ever see u smile....i just feel damm happy..... anyway just one thing....i really hope that....i could just shout it out loud.....once for all and close this topic....and keep it safely in my heart....forever....n continue....with what i think is best....and do the best for it.....and just remain it till the day i got the answer then i will plan what to do.....


for now...i am only able to continue.....predict and seek for the answer.....anyway when the times come it will come.....and if it really come i don't think i can run......and i also feel like shout out loud how much i miss....and how much i care towards the sea....n hope the sea would bring my msg to you......cause i do not dare to tell or msg to someone....that i really really care......♥

Wonder why it is so miracle.....

I was so bored on playing my games... So I was so boring till... I got nothing to do... I spent time looking back on all the things... that had happen... few months... back... I was actually laughing and smiling to myself.... When.. I go through all the things... I really feel so... funny.. and happy.... never know that... since this happen I was so happy... anyway... I was thinking..... how miracle....things can happen.... how miracle.... it...was.... two stranger can meet up and turn out to be friend... haha.... it is so miracle and... fated I guess....

Do you believe it....things happen just like a flash.... If I did not go through.... all this message, status and comment... I never know that....things happen so fast.....wahaha... it is.....looking at the... conversation and the status... it really make my day... cause really funny loh.... I wonder why there is so many things to say.... haha.... in this past few months I really got to admit... that.... I am really very happy and comfortable..... but I still can say that...this is how life is...things can happen.... so sudden without any notice.....

Sometimes... I really feel that... I am being bless all the times...because... lot of things happen... just in time.... I do not know whether I am lucky or what... because... when my life in.. trouble... there is always people would come in... to make my life.... joyful again.... haha... maybe god really love me... that's why I say why it is so miracle.... haha.... The best part in life now is... because... I really feeling so enjoy... no matter what...

Sometimes... I do feel emo... but when... I think of...the few of them... it really make my day wonderful.....haha... this few day I was.. thinking... I hate the feeling when I really care... because..... I know nothing much I can do for them... but they have done a lots for me..... anyway... the only thing I can do is treat them better.....anyway... just want to say I really appreciate so much......

Anyway.... just want to say I do not why I have a very special feeling where by... I really stuck for so long... if you ask me..... I do not even know how... to explain it....but only one word can say... it really give me... a very different feeling... but it is not..... lover feeling..... but is just a very.... special feeling..... where by I totally don't know how to explain it at all......maybe this is the specialty.... I guess.... anyway...as I say... I will let it be as it is.... cause... I think it is... just a miracle that is happening in my life.... haha.... but I really got to admit...one thing..... looking at all the things... the only things I can say is happy...... that's all I can say.... haha..... anyway.... it really so hard to believe.. when... things happen just like flash.... haha.....

Should not be....

It had been really weird..... I have not have this feeling for so long why suddenly... I have this feeling....I hope I will not be like last time.... being... I do not want to turn back... like what I use to be..... I notice I have been feeling very emo... for the past 2 days.... I hate this feeling..... I start to can't fall asleep... and all kind of stupid things too.... what the hell.....

Maybe it is time... to slowly.... get myself out from this.... bloody situation.... I need to slowly give less.... and slowly... by slowly everyday.... don't care.... because.... I realize that... I am losing..... don't know is my problem or what...maybe the less I give the less I would feel hurt... I am once again badly injured again this time.... all I need is time to heal... my injury...I have discover.... that the answer is so obvious....the answer lead me to clearly understand.... that..... what I have thought earlier... is true.... cause slowly by slowly....all this is.. happening..... Just thought that... god like to play joke on people.....

From the moment I woke up today... this strong feeling is keep on appearing in my... mind... till now I am writing this blog... it is... still appearing... what ever it is....I have made a mistake.... but sometimes... I just wonder give to much is a wrong... or what... ??? anyway... I don't know how long would this emo.... going to be with me once again..... whatever it is... I just want to say that.... in this world... when you wish for something it will never ever happen... it will just make you suffer rather then give you what you want.....

Just Blog....

Haha... finally tonight I got time to do my blog..... haiz.. the past few day I was so busy till I do not even have time for my own... because went I got home from work I am so tired till I even lazy to on my lappy.....Since... today is weekend so I decided to... update my blog...... Lately so many things had happen... lots of funny things... sad things.... and happy things... of course.....

Sad things... is I have hurt a good guy for one reason... because... I am not ready to accept... a relationship... since I prefer to be alone.... haha... cause I do not want stress..... I feel that... my life is already so stress..... so for the time being.... I just don't want any stress.... so I decided to reject him...... maybe after... I have solve all the matter I would accept.... haha.. all depends....on fate ba....

Sometimes... I wonder what got into me... I find myself become so stupid this few day... and blur.... just wonder what the hell wrong with me....haiz.. maybe I am under to much stress... haha.....such a normal... things... I could not even... do... haiz.... something really wrong with me... don't know whether is because I am lazy or.... I am just being stupid..... I hope that I am stupid not lazy....don't know lah I feel that I am craping for no reason.... haha

What ever it.. is just hope that.... it would just... over as fast as possible..... cause I really feeling annoying with that... bloody idiot person...... never seen such a person.... like this for.... haiz... and I hope that.... my wish could come true... too.... cause I have been waiting... for my one and only wish... haha.... hopefully it won't disappoint me.... haha.... If my wish come true... I guess I would be the most luckiest person... and bless... haha... but no matter what... I am working.. on it to.... need lost of hardwork loh.... anyway.... I hope that.. my hard work would help me... haha....

Anyway.... as usual I miss all my friends.... haha.... this is the things for sure de wahaha....anyway... just hope that they would be happy always.... and forever bless with lots of love... haha.....Miss you guys so much..... anyway... crap to much... time to stop... if not this blog would.. be to long... and all rubbish.... wakaka.... May god bless all of you... and my entire family.... haha....

Slow weekend.....

I wonder this... week... the time has pass by so slowly..... I wonder... how come so slow... it is like damm hard to go through.....actually I am very busy but... how come the time goes by so slow.... everyday... as usual need to work... and need to study.... suppose it goeas by fast but this week the time really slow... haiz.. just don't understand....why???

I realize that... my life now is working... and studying.... what the hell... begin to realize that I do not have much time for myself....the only time I have for myself is only weekend.... but this weekend... totally don't have... cause this week I also got work... haha...tomorrow sunday also need to work... haiz.... I guess only for this week...after this week maybe next week I want to plan on a trip..... cause I realize that...for almost... few months I did not go for a trip... already... suppose to go Melake this week but I was so busy so the trip is cancel... haiz So I guess next week I am going on a trip.... wahaha....

Sometime.... I wonder how am I able to cope with this working and studying life.... OMG I have been very stress recently......haiz..... and i realize that... I am so stupid...... I have been studying... the stupid subject for days... but I still can't solve this stupid... question... Just a very simple question....till now I still not yet done... haiz... I am really so stupid..... My friend say to me I am not stupid.. is just that... I am lazy don't want to do that's why....I also don't know lah.... I just hope that... I can't settle..... my homework... before more to come... and the few other subject... I want to finish at least one chapter for each subject.... argh... looks like it is so hard but I have no choice.... I am wasting to much time on... this diploma... haiz.... anyway... I a going to work for it.... wahaha....

Yesterday I have been asking myself one very weird question... but I do not know what I should do... haiz.... anyway..... since I don't know what to do... so I just leave it as it is.... haha... but one things I am comfirm is.... I am missing someone..... for the next week too.... and I am also missing my friends that study in KL... haiz... and I am waiting for my another friends to come back from KL... haiz.... just miss all of them.... but of course I really damm miss my pig head sister.. cause I really don't know when she will come back... haiz...... anyway.... I really damm miss them...... :((

If I have the chance.....I want to do something really stupid... haiz.... but I scared to do so.... anyway.... god ls bless them ....with lots of love.....

Thought... of you and you and you...... and you...

I was thinking.....something but I don't understand why....??? I really don't get it.... I am such a hot temper person... but how come when with my friend..... why I can't even lost my temper at all.... is not I don't want to lost my temper... but the problem is i totally I can't lost my temper at all.... why can anyone tell me why.... ??? just don't get it.....On that day after having tuition... I was thinking.... why I would listen....she say no I also keep quiet and being so obedient.... argh.... why am I so obedient... how come when my friends say no... I also... listen.... why I so sacred of my this friend..... ???? One of my friend... make fun of me....because I mention this to her... and she say... since when I become so lousy.... she laugh at me non stop.... argh...angry... angry...with her.... 555 the worse is... my friend say if one day... she ask me to eat the things... that i hate the most would i eat it.... seriously.. when she pop up this question I was totally stuck... and silence...... then she look at my face and start laughing.... walua...just becuase at that time when I mention this problem... We were having lunch.. and I am actually choosing out the carrot... WTF.... Really can't stand here loh.... OMG... haiz....

Why... like that... even... I don't feel like doing the homework that... been given by my friend...I also scared and dare not don't do... walau.... If someone...else... I already.... ignore.... loh... I don't even border at all.... haiz... what lah....why... I can be so obedient....... anyway... no point to think so much.. i guess because I am not able to find the answer... just...leave it...ba... anyway... just thinking ... and feel funny..... why me so lousy...... wahaha dumb dumb..... me... anyway... just let it be ba as long as.... I am comfortable and aswhile as my friend too will do.... hehe.....

Actually.. this few day... I am thinking of so many things... seriously.. I miss you all so much... but... we were all so busy to... meet up and... some of you are so far... haiz.... I miss all the sweet memory... when we together... now we were all so far apart... even those who are still in JB all busy with our own things..... sometimes.. when I think of all the stupid things that we do together... I feel that all of us where so stupid... but we were all so happy together.... haiz....one of my friend came back from UK.. we also don't have much time... to meet up... because we were busy with our own stuff.. haiz... don't know when only we have the time to meet again... haiz.... and another friend came back form.... KL... for more than... one months plus... we totally did not meet up at all.... haiz.....what lah.. when they find me I am busy... when my turn to find them.. they were busy... what lah.... just miss all the time we use to have.... haha....I miss you all so much.....

Just now.. on FB keep on comment with my sister.....she went back to sabah... for like nearly 4 years already....till now we never meet up with each other... I really miss her so much.... haha... but what can I do we were so far apart... haiz.... I miss the time when we were together... I know she dote me... but what can I do we were so far away....haiz.... seriously need to make a plan to go sabah to find her.... cause I really damm miss her so much.... but don't know how to tell my this sister lah.... sometimes.. talk to her feel like vomit blood... haha.... but I really miss her.... just wanna say that... jie wait me go sabah find you ok...but I still hope you can come back to JB.... haha

BTW.....i guess for the next two weeks..... I will damm miss someone too... haiz... cause she not coming back.... haha... anyway use to miss all of you already.... lah.. so no different....haha...